I was born in trauma. The sexual trauma has affected me most illogically and any sorts of sexual intimacy has always been associated with the feeling of re-enacting sexual abuse all over again. Even just a touch from others on myself, I would feel immediately violated afresh. I have been sexually abused by everyone around me in my life.

Everyone have always crossed boundaries with me. I was made to submit to my abusers, being extremely seductive to them and attractive in my body, to suit their sexual needs and temptations. I had no choice but to obey them. They took complete advantage of my C-DID psychiatric condition, turning what they would equalize love as abuse. I could not differentiate which is which clearly.